Thirteen Things
MON-MON
Likes About Poly
(aka Poly Pro List)
1. The Personal Journey – I’ve learned so much about myself, how I love, and why I do the things I do because I walked down the poly path. I truly believe most people go through life never questioning why they do the things they do and whether it makes sense.
2. The People - alternative lifestyles attract people who don’t necessarily play by the rules and who don’t just choose the road most traveled. Poly also attracts very loving and very open individuals who look at love as a commodity best shared with everyone. I like that concept.
3. The Freedom – I need lots of freedom in relationships, and when I’m in the right relationship, I get that. Freedom to me does not mean doing whatever the hell I want at any cost – but rather the freedom to express myself and be heard and understood by my partners.
4. Flirting w/o Repercussions: I’ve always believed I would find other people attractive even if I was madly in love. Turns out I was right! With poly, if I meet someone who I find attractive and can safely flirt without pissing off any partner they might have, my partner *supports* my ability to do just that… sometimes he *even* encourages it when he knows I like someone and I’m a little shy to act on it.
5. The Community – We have an active poly group here in Colorado, and I just love, LOVE the fact that we do. One of the greatest poly organizations is Loving More (based in CO), and the woman who runs it is awesome, as is her partner that lives here in CO with her.
6. The Online Community – I spend a lot of time online getting to know folks all over the world who are long time poly folk, new to poly, never heard of poly or trying to understand a poly partner. I learn so much about interactions with people, how to express myself in a better manner, how to offer support and advice without being judgmental – and I also get all of that in return. I’m so very thankful for my online friends.
7. Acceptance – at least by people who understand how I feel about live and love. For so long I felt alone because I could conceptulize how I wanted to love and be loved but the only models I had around me were lifetime monogamy (which seemed very hard to achieve), serial monogamy (which I found unappealing), and singlehood. I thought I was destined to be a spinster or the crazy old lady with all those cats – until I found polyamory.
8. New Relationship Energy - the coin termed to explain the gushy, romantic, crazy, sexy attraction everyone experiences in the beginning of a new relationship (yes, even monogamists, gays, lesbians, etc). We all love that first intense period of any new relationship.
9. The T-Shirts – visit http://shop.cafepress.com/polyamory and search on polyamory. They are wonderful!
10. The Poly Bloggers – I love a good blog, and I love a great poly blog. I love it when folks get out there on the net to share their joys and trials all with the hope to help someone else who might be feeling as they do. I just wish people read it to actually learn, instead of feeding some insatiable need to enjoy other’s misery. Ah well, one step at a time…
11. Poly Blogging – I love being able to share my own poly stories and poly viewpoints with the group of folk who bother to read my blog. It’s catharitic, fun, and I love to write so it fulfills that need in me.
12. The Get-Togethers – who loves a good party? ME! I DO!
13. My Poly Partner – Even though he was poly before I met him, and even though I’ve learned so much from him about loving honestly and with integrity – I also get to watch as he learns all of those items as well. I’m also thankful that I get to enjoy watching his growth, all the while experiencing my own personal growth.
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