About a week after ending our triad, my gf let me know that I was being somewhat distant in my dealings with her. It wasn’t intentional – I tend to go inward when I’m dealing with a problem or struggling with how to deal with someone. It is a little off-putting when most of the time I’m the happy, go lucky, have fun, let’s love everyone kind of gal you usually know.
Still, I didn’t mean to close her out. I was just trying to deal with all these emotions I couldn’t really explain. I knew N wanted to keep things the way they were amongst the three of us, but I kept thinking, “she doesn’t want the triad,” which was a big way that the three of us all were. I was having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that she was still my girlfriend even though she broke up with me. But not really.
It was very confusing, and I guess for her too. We had many conversations about what led to her wanting to end the triad. And unfortunately none of them made her stance any clearer, especially when she shared that she’d been crying pretty much the whole time since the break-up. So we talked about what she needed, and she decided she needed some time to think things through.
A few days later, we all got together so she could talk to J and me. And she said she realized she was just running away because she was scared. Scared the relationship would work… scared she might fall in love… scared she might want to be a part of something. But when she thought it all through, she knew what she needed to do was give it a try. Try to work through the hard times instead of running at the first sign of hard work.
So we are still together. The triad is once again on. We spent a marvelous Christmas together and look forward to ringing in the New Year with each other.
Who knows? Maybe it will work out after all….
rockin’ good news! merry new year!